Hey, wait a second.

According to the VuTales user list, I'm registered user number 42.

WHEE I AM SPECIAL FOR SOME REASON. LUL SO RANDUM xDDDD

Was browsing VuTales, decided that the fact I don't have any activity on here needs to be remedied. So alright, let's go.

I haven't been playing any MMOs recently- the last one I got into was Guild Wars, which has the least amount of GRINDING of practically any game. Grinding, of course, being the absolute worst way to gain a level. My computer, however, doesn't like the idea of an enjoyable activity, and so I can't partake in mostly anything PvP due to the incredible lag.
Yeah, meh.

Otherwise, I've been playing a lot of Pokemon recently. I don't remember how, or why, but I definitely know why I am.

I will destroy Vane.

While I was playing, we got to talking and he eventually played me with the pokemon he'd "obtained" from a friend. Very, very one-sided battle, because it wasn't set to Level 100, and I only own one level 100 pokemon.
He had his Arceus and Darkrai. It was basically a rout.

I could not leave my good name besmirched in such a foul manner, so I swore my revenge and proceeded to train furiously.
My thoughts were along the lines of "Well jeez, they are good pokemon but he doesn't know the first thing about the game mechanics! If I bothered to raise a competitive team, I'll win for sure!"
Um, about that.

I knew he'd use the same team as last time, that being Arceus / Darkrai / Giratina / Azelf / Torterra / (who cares), but I failed to act on this information, throwing together a team I thought would work alright.
That team was as follows:

Tentacruel: Toxic Spikes / Surf / Knock Off / Rapid Spin
Saru- Ninjask: Swords Dance / Substitute / Baton Pass / X-Scissor
Maki- Swellow@Flame Orb: Facade / Brave Bird / Steel Wing / Protect
Nagasumi- Garchomp: Earthquake / Stone Edge / Crunch / Dragon Claw
Snover: Ice Shard / Blizzard / Grass Knot / Leech Seed (not fully trained, as I am a stupid)
San-chan- Walrein@Leftovers: (Ice Body) Protect / Substitute / Blizzard / Surf

Now, that looks at least fairly solid, right? Should have won against a team that didn't know how to fight it. I took it into battle with confidence…
…and then proceeded to do everything wrong.

I put out Tentacruel first. He lead with Darkrai.

"FFFF-"

Darkrai's Dark Void instantly ended any opportunity Tentacruel had of being useful, and then proceeded to maul it with Dark Pulse. Well, one pokemon down, the next one can't fail.
I send out Ninjask, who I KNOW is faster than Darkrai (darkrai in question not being a Deoxys-S) and proceed to Substitute into what I assume will be a Dark Void.
He switches to Giratina. Hey, I got a substitute up, I'm ahead of the game, right?
Ninjask uses Swords Dance on its turn, trying to drum up some bonuses.
Giratina proceeds to repeatedly Dragon Claw, tearing down Ninjask's paper substitutes. I put them up to drum up Speed Boosts anyway, and right when he thinks he's got me…
Ninjask used Baton Pass! Here comes Garchomp, gon' tear you up!
Aurida sent out Swellow!

FFFFFF- GOD DANG FINGERS ARGH WHY.

Swellow survives the incoming Dragon Claw with no problem, and then suffers a burn from its Flame Orb. However, Facade, its primary weapon, can't be used on Giratina, a Ghost-type. I forget how Brave Bird does against Dragons, so I use Steel Wing instead. After all, it's got a Swords Dance and Guts boost under its wing, it's going to wreck it easily, right?

Doesn't even knock the jerk into the yellow.

FFFFFF-

Anyway, next pokemon I send out is Snover. Snover's Snow Warning whips up a hailstorm!
Now, if I'd bothered to train this guy properly, Giratina'd be feeling threatened right now. Of course, since I was a lazy, its main purpose is just to set up Snow Warning and then die. It does both of these awfully well.

Aurida sent out San-chan!

My Walrein of doom. I'm not confident in its killing ability, because I expected Toxic Spikes support from Tentacruel, but I'll take what I can get.
Now that it's in Hail, this Walrein recovers 12.5% of its HP every turn due to Leftovers and Ice Body. It can use Protect and Substitute until it runs out of PP, and if it doesn't need to it can snipe away with Blizzard, which hurts like hell.

After a long and drawn-out battle, Giratina dies to the Hail.

My foe sends out Torterra, which is 4x weak to Ice. I laugh and one-hit KO it.

He also sends out Darkrai, who meets a Substitute upon every Dark Void attempt. I toss Ninjask out to take a Dark Pulse and die. After more Hail stall, he switches it out- one turn before hail damage would have killed it.

Vane sent out Arceus!
"Oh, has Vane already been declared the victor?"

Dang, it's the friggin' goat. After another long and drawn-out battle, during which Garchomp is thrown out in a moment of crisis to take the hit and die, San-chan the noble Walrein finally expires.

6:3 game.

…Well, that didn't work. But mark my words, I will have my revenge. I will end you.

In fact, I'm almost done with my team now. Just one more pokemon to train, and I'll taste sweet victory.

I'M SERIOUS GUYS.