Life is a [Insert swear word here].

Life is always finding news ways to make us miserable.

I didn't think my family could sink so low. But when you have to survive, I guess some people would do anything.

Lately, it's been harder and harder to get the money we need to pay for anything in general.
With my mother's surgery, it leaves her unable to work, and my father is too lazy to get a job.
It's up to me, but with my surgery date coming closer, I won't be able to work until after my wound completely heals and that may take up to a month.

My mom is becoming desperate and when people are desperate, they'll do anything to get what they need.

Because of all my mother's medical problems, they've given my mom loads of pills to take. One of them being a narcotic.
My mother refuses to take them, since they are narcotics and she could easily be addicted to them.
However, recently, she's found a new use for them.

…

She's selling her narcotic pills to make money to pay our bills. Which is sad really. For us to sink this low. It makes me want to cry. I wish she would stop, but if we don't, we won't be able to pay anything and we'll get kicked out. If the police find out that she's selling drugs, she'll be thrown in jail for God knows how long.
This is a huge problem.

There are a lot of things falling apart. I try to make sense of it. But I keep forgetting that my feelings don't matter anymore.
I feel so selfish for feeling this depressed. But what else am I supposed to do?

~Jaz