Nass and Alberto.

After around 2 weeks of talking to this girl, she offered me sex.

I was like

But I had to turn her down. Because I'm gay. Cuz like I always liked to think that sex had to mean something for it to be cool.
Y'know like romantic sex, or sympathy sex, shit like that. So yeah I was like "Naw."

So she put her number into my phone and said "Give me a call if you change your mind. I really do like you Mike."

I wuz like "oh my gawd. She wants mai penis."

Later that evening, I was feeling pretty stupid. "Dammit meng." I thought. "You just turned down some virgin poon!"
I played with my earrings (something I do when I'm bored) and thought. I was like "hmmmm, my mind is right. Not to mention, you still have YOUR virginity to get rid of yourself…"

So I went to consult a friend. Someone who didn't think like me, so it'd actually help me….

He said something like (iunno exactly all of it, cuz I was watching a soccer game on TV too.): Your first time should have meaning. Not just some random girl, it has to be with someone you care about.

Shit. He thought like I did. "Yea but, there's no point in saving myself anymore, it's not like the first girl is gonna be the girl I live my whole life with."

….

"Is she hot?"

"Dude omg yes."

"….k."

See how supportive my friends are?

So I was kinda in the same position I was in like 15mins ago. So I called the girl.

"Hello?"
"Yo. Itz Mike."
"Oh hey Mike! Where are you?"
"At my house…listen…about the offer…"
"Oh great is your mom or anyone up?"
"No but listen…"
"What?"
"…." I started to pussy out. "Where are you right now?"
"At a friend's house. I'm sleeping over,but her parents aren't in."
"Oh sweet."
"Wait hang on."
-talking in background-
"Mike, you have to come over! She said you could."
"It's just you two?"
"Yeah, I already told her about the…thing…"
Fuck. "Oh where does she live?"

Next thing I knew, I was walking to her friend's house.

Around 30mins later..

We were all watching a film. When the girl put her hand on my lap.The movie was boring anyway.

Before I continue, I just wanted to say that I nicknamed my penis Alberto. He's a Spanish-African. I tend to have conversations with him. The following was one of those times.

"Al, do you want to do this? I'll go through with it if you want to."
"Si senor."
"So you wanna do it?"
"Si."
"We're signing up for possible commitment here."
"Commitment…? Oh man no bueno (sorry I sux at spanish…I only took a 30min intro class online to impress this girl one time 🙁 TarTar, or someone good in spanish correct plz)
"Yeah. That's what I'm stuck on."
"Hmmmm….I need some daylight though."
"I'm fapping when I get home if this doesn't happen."
"Oh really? You look tired."
"No worries, I can handle it."
"Whoa man, she's moving closer to me. Lemme stand at attention. Show her I'm here."
"What? Oh shit, Al no! NO! NO! ALBERTOOOOOO!!!!!!!"

But it was too late.

I was pretty much screwed. Had an Eiffel Tower in my pants, and a horny girl.
Evasive maneuver!1!! So I kissed her. Only thing I could think of atm.
But it was a trap. Now she started tugging at my pants. Thinking, I continued to kiss her. Oh shit. Her friend!

I broke off and turned to her friend. "Must be pretty awkward for you huh?" I laughed, secretly thanking her for sitting there.
"Oh sorry." She stood up. "I'll go take a shower now." Zooom, she was gone.

Remember that time I thanked her for being there? I take it back.

Long story short, because even I don't know what happened, she just gave me a BJ.

Wasn't my first one, but it was by far the best.

And that's why I didn't fap tonight.

Ew man, this is a nasty blog.
Now…as soon as I get my report card, phase 69 of my ultimate plan will start.
~Nass