Getting back exam papers.

Getting exam papers has never made me so jittery before. Jittery, as in, "OMFG AHHHH SHIZ SHIZ SHIZ I'M DEAD WE'RE DOOMED FFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU".

Ok, nevermind, I shall abandon all composure.

OMG OMG OMG OMG AHHHHH HUGE RELIEF. Kind of. There are more papers tomorrow but for now it's dandy. Relatively.

Previous blog on exams turned out to be paranoia after all. Though not all was.

But first period was Chemistry.

The teacher made her entrance like this:

I was doodling at that time, so when I heard that, I decided to express my feeling through a doodle.

Translation for the top picture:

OH SH:)T OH Sh:)T OH SH:) AHHH THAT'S JUST IT WE'RE ALLLL DOOOOOOOOOMED AHHHH WE'RE ALL GONNA DIEE

And the bottom:

OMG PHEW PHEW PHEW OK I PASSED CHEMISTRY.

But I'm still dead aren't I?

Yes, somehow I was in the half that didn't fail. By a long shot too. When I got my paper back, I felt like jumping for joy. But wisely decided not to.

The joy is only momentary, however. It always is, ain't it?

"MATH. MATH MATH MATH MATH MATH AHHHHHHHHH. Additional Mathematics. BLAHCRAP!"

Everyone was saying that. For good reason.

Only 10 people in class passed.

And I was sure I am absolutely not going to be one of them for a few good reasons.

1. Karma. I crammed last minute whilst others revised for a month!
2. I suck at math
3. I hate math
4. The teacher told me about how many crosses he put on my paper a few days prior
5. I suck at math
6. I forgot some formulas
7. Make that many formulas.
8. The paper was fracken hard.

So not a chance. Not a chance.

Imagine my shock when I got back the paper and found out that I passed. By a pretty long shot. I got a 67/100. O-O

While I was really, really relieved, like, "OH MY GAWD HAHAH MY LUCK'S UP HAHAHAHA", at the same time, I feel like, "Oh, sh:)t, looks like I've had my quota of luck and the next paper's going to be crash and burn.

Somehow that hasn't happened yet. In comes Physics.

Physics is my worst subject next to Chinese and I was absolutely sure I would fail. The teacher said that only 5 people passed, and out of the 5, 2 were girls.

The catch? Well there are bloody 18 people in the class.

The first thing the teacher did was congratulate a retainee (she stayed back one year) for a job well done for passing the physics paper. Which was expected, she was quite a physics ace. Except she barely passed.

So there was only 1 other girl, and she was supposedly also 2nd in class. And it just can't have been me. Because, you know, my physics sucked real hard and I wasn't sure of the answers to half the paper. And I sleep in class often. And I wasn't too sure about my concepts because I sleep in class often. So there's just no way, no way I'm the other girl. So it was a drum roll moment, and we were all staring hard at our physics teacher.

She made eye contact with me and somehow I thought that she looked at me to tell me I was it. I could feel my heart start to race. Oh, come on, that's just silly, I told myself, and proceeded to bury my face in my hands. Gonna fail fo' sure. Oh yes…

She pointed to me and the whole class was like "wtfgnowai?!!".

Including me. I was like, 'Dude you sure you saw the marks right?!!'

But she didn't make a mistake. I felt a little light headed as I received my paper from her.

That was a pretty awesome moment though. First time I was in the top 3 for, well, anything related to academics.

I felt like I've went beyond my luck quota. I mean, the mere fact that I'm not failing any of these paper is just proof of my immense luck. I've had classmates who failed like, all 3 subjects. So my luck has definitely run out. Definitely. Ran out and beyond, looking at how I did for physics… -headdesk-

;-;

Yes it has run out.

And this time, this time… It's not my paranoia. Really.

-Screaming section alert-
AIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKRRRAAAAAAAAAPSSS STUPID STUPID WHY THE F:)CK DID I EVEN MANAGE TO DO THAT HOW DID IT EVEN HAPPEN!!!!!!!! STUPIDCRAPPINGCHOCOLATECOOKIEMONSTERNOMNOMCRAPPINGBUNNYLLAMAATWALMARTDIDN'TFAILTHISBADTOOAHHHHHNOTEVENPINKLEOTARDWHALEMONSTER3qraq238ha32qtrhawesdfAW8EWYRmsdo -incomprehensible muttering-

-screaming section end-

I knew it I knew it I knew it my luck has run out.

I failed my Chinese compo. I mean really.

WHAT THE BLOODY HELL, I STAPLED THE LAST PAGE WRONGLY AND SHE CROSSED OUT MY FIRST AND SECOND PAGES, BECAUSE I ACCIDENTALLY CANCELLED A CRUCIAL PARAGRAPH LINKING THE "TWO COMPOS" TOGETHER

AND I WROTE A HELL LOT OF GRAMMATICALLY (damn Chinese and its randomly complex and complicated grammar structure with delocalized strokes and weak random strokey bonds) WRONG SENTENCES WHICH ATE AWAY HALF THE MARKS.

So I failed.

T_T

At least the blow wasn't too much of a blow because I've been bracing myself for it. But it still hurts.

But at least the big relief is that it's not enough to fail me, because my structured paper scored purty well (2nd in class, which is pretty sad actually, cus it's exactly a B3) . And that's what's calming me down. Y'see I actually studied pretty hard for it so I'd totally cry if my structured paper failed too.

I'm one of the only students in my class who hasn't failed any subjects yet.

I know I'm going to screw up my English. And my Social Studies. And my History. I know it. Today's a good day. Tomorrow will be bad. AURGHH.

Conclusion:

Four papers down, three more to go.

Tomorrow's judgement day, huh… -rubs palms together-

If I fail English, there'll be hell to pay. Won't get promoted and crap. And my mom will eat me.

Activated: Paranoia

-headdesk-

I'm such an optimistic, cheery person. I know.

Hey, look, my 3rd blog on real life stuff. I must bore you to death. ._.